Let's call him Dave!

For the purposes of this post let's call the guy Dave. Dave and I met on my 22nd birthday at a club with some friends. I know it is said that you shouldn't meet guys at a club, but at that age isn't that where most of us meet people? Anyway, Dave and I started seeing each other and things were going great. (Don’t they always in the beginning). So what happened? Well, come to find out that Dave never considered us dating. Excuse me? What the hell do you call it when you go out to dinner, watch movies together, go out with other couples all the while holding hands and kissing.( yes, eventually sex) I should have known better when he slept with one of my friends, but I let him back into my life anyway. See, clueless! This "not dating" went on and off for over a year. I had finally had enough of Dave coming over to my house after a night out with his guy friends, drunk. After countless time of telling him to go home and stop knocking on my door he finally got the message. Can you believe I had to tell him several times on several different occasions to go away? I can! After all, what do you expect when in the beginning I would say go away and then just give in? Dave finally got it and stopped coming around when I stood my ground and he knew I wasn't going to play that game anymore. At least I thought he got the message, that was until I ran into him again about 7 years later.

I was out with a girlfriend of mine when I ran into Dave. He had since been married, had a child, and gotten a divorce. He let me know about the divorce within the first 30 seconds of seeing him. He hung around and talked with me and my friend the rest of the night. When my friend and I left, I took her home and then went straight home to my house. I got out of my car to find out that Dave had followed me home. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!! Who did he think he was, who did he think I was? I immediately let him know that he was making me uncomfortable and I wanted him to leave. I think the look of shock on his face was about the same as mine. I couldn't believe he thought I was the same person. Needless to say, or in Dave's case it might need to be said, he got in his car and left. I received a couple of phone calls from him in the next few days, but I was not interested in going down that road again.

So there are at least two things to be learned here, one of which you'll see in later posts it took me a while to learn. First, if you don't like the way your significant other is treating you, STOP letting them treat you that way. Seriously, what do you expect if you keep letting it happen. Second, don't assume someone you knew long ago is still the same person. It might be worth trying to find out if they have changed, or it might not.